The Visitation Saga Part 3: The Food

Maggie was fun to watch, if not fun for Sancho to experience, and the the adventures were most definitely adventurous, but what really pulled the whole experience together was the food. Both Buttons and Lemington are great cooks, and they used their skills to maximum. It was an occasion for feasting and celebration because, as we all know, Wednesday was the day nearest and dearest to most of our hearts: Australia Day. I have mentioned that Lemington is Australian, and in honor of celebrating Australia Day, I ate some Vegemite. Buttons has called to my attention that in past episodes of Temporary Hermit I made the statement "Vegemite? I'm not touching that shit." It is time to retract that statement and issue an apology, as I found Vegemite to be somewhat decent tasting.

I don't know if the traditional Australia Day feasting is done with fish and chips or shepherd's pie, but it could be either or both, as we had both of those things, and I was generally stuffing my face for three straight days so I don't recall which day is actually Australia Day. This wasn't any half assed fish and chips, either. Homemade beer batter, Alaskan cod, fries made on the spot, homemade tartar sauce. It was epic. This is what the cooking process looked like for the fish and chips dinner, as depicted by a time lapse made by Buttons. It clearly shows me working my butt off while those two loafers sipped booze and waited for the food to show up.

The fish and chips were good. They were, in fact delicious. The sheperd's pie, though, made fish and chips look like toe jam from a catfish farmer. I know what the image of shepherd's pie is. It's something like ground meat stuff cooked with some frozen vegetables underneath some potatoes. Whoopidy frickin doo. But THIS shepherd's pie was made from lamb and duck! The crust was made from scratch, the potatoes had all sort of crazy stuff in them I can't even hope to describe, the vegetables were baked in duck fat, gravy from scratch, and some crazy kind of stock that took all day to boil with a whole bunch of random stuff in it! Observe...

You can imagine what this has done to a poor hermitly soul used to canned vegetarian chile and an occasional plate of couscous and lentils to spice things up. I feel like a Bushman who just got handed a Coke bottle, only to have it taken away again. The horrible fickleness of the universe is almost too much to bear. The really great news is that I don't have to bear it yet, because they made two pies and left me a whole one, so I am still eating duck and lamb tastiness. In addition we had Lemington (Lemington's namesake), an Australian cake that is pretty much normal cake with fruit and whip cream, always a positive. Am I convincing you that these meals were good? I feel like I need to be grasping someone by the shoulders and shaking them furiously to make them understand how good the food was. It has also revolutionized my ideas about what hospitality should be. Traditionally, guests come over, the hosts cook, clean, and entertain. On this occasion, however, Buttons and Lemington came over, brought the food, cooked the food, cleaned the kitchen, and washed the dishes. Perfect! It was like I got attacked by a catering service intent on making me fatter. Its the best!

Your humble hermit has just investigated how much time is left to hermitize, and the answer is very little. This means that the race for the Memorial Anthony of Egypt National Most Hermitly Award is on its last legs. I predict ending my hermitage on the 2nd of February, maybe the 3rd. I will therefore declare the winner of the Memorial Anthony of Egypt National Most Hermitly Award on the 3rd. New Zealand is still ahead, but there is time for a challenge! Rise up, mighty nations, and hermit like never before!